B.

Safe. 2.11.17

When things get rough, and I feel like giving up. Who do I lean on? Who do I talk to?

You. It’s always you. My guidance. My understanding. of myself.

All this time, Thinking trust is too easy. When really there’s no trust at all.

The irony. of life. The mind. Me. You. Because with you, I’m safe.

-B.

Stuck. 8.29.2017

I hate that I feel this way. I just want to be free. From the guilt. The burdens. The pain.

Someone once said, “Hurt people, hurt people.” And with myself I find this to be true. I see can how it can happen.

Because I am hurt. But I don't want to hurt people. So, how do I stay humble?

How do I break the cycle, and continue? Giving up crosses my mind, but not because it's easier. Because I sometimes, don't feel I'm worth it.

I used to tell myself that even if I just died believing it were possible, and accomplished nothing. I would died satisfied. Complete. Because, I'd die trying.

These hard times, lead me to forget that belief. Run from it even.

I just feel stuck.

Here is a little about me...

Over the past year I’ve found myself in a dark place. Eventually I found myself not writing, AT ALL! I have been writing sense I was 8 years old. I used poetry, short stories, and diary entries as a way to cope with the good and bad. I am now working on myself and writing again. As I work I think more and more about someone like me. Someone out there is going through darkness. What if words could help, even if it’s just to let them know they aren't alone? So recently I felt like I needed to start sharing my thoughts with the world. Not many people have seen what is buried in a diary, memory box, or hard drive. But I’m anonymous so I can share and not feel guilty or awkward. I’m ready to give this a try and for what constructive criticism is to come.

Poetry to come... B.